I'm closing my blog

So this is the end. goodbye blog world. You've served your purpose. BYEEEEEE

It so HOT!!!!!

its like over 100 degrees ( farenhiet) thats like 38 dregrees celcius. Anyways I've been super busy with theatre and school. Pre-calculus has been really hard for me this year, so i got a tutor. I had SAT prep test today. SAT is like a college admission test. We are having an Eid party at my house today so I also have to clean :p

My Eid

So thursday after school and after rehersals, I came ditch my school bag, took a shower and got started on my nails. I wasn't fasting that day so I decided to pamper and feed myself at the same time. My mom refuses to spend money on us for a salon so we do things ourselves. It took my quite awhile than usual to get my nails done perfectly. Then I did my hair and scribbled on some hennah. I have no talent for it, my sister does, but i was impatient I did it myself. We had guests from North cali who were going to spend eid with us come over. The next morning, I got up got dressed. I wore this red anarkoli, I'll get pics of it later. and my makeup and [ut fianl adjustments to my hair. We went to the Mosque in Ontario and it was super fun with all our friends and stuff. Then we went to this house where we've gone first at Eid day since we were like born. I have friends there so it was fun. And OMG fooodddd. yummm. then we went to this other house. It was fun too, but my parents needed to go someplace so they kinda ditched us at the second house and would came back for it later. I think my sisterss and I sort of overstayed our welcame.... I went to a third house and met up with friends there too. We came back around 4 pm. which is a big dissapointment, but the family that stayed with us was making their tri back up north. After awhile i grabbed a bunch of food and locked myself in my room watching tv. we had a few guests taht too. It was a really super fun eid.

The next day i attempted to do some homework. And later at night, we got all dressed up again and went o my friends house, where she graciously gifted us with purses and products. ( some of my favorite things :] ). from there we went to another party. and came back at one pm at night. super fun eid so far :)

OMG ALMOST EID!

as a friend of mine put it on facebook... its that time of year again.....hennah...new clothes...and lotsssss of fooddd!

oh and i got the lead in the play this year!!!!!

Oh God, Please Help

I seem to blog more whenever things are going wrong instead of right. So here is today's bad situation. give advice if you can help me, this is really personal and I really enjoy the anonomity.

So my 6 year litle sister went into a room without saying salam and my dad gets furious. he threatens to beat her so my little sister rushes to my middle sisters room to hide, my middle sister tells me quick hide your stuff, turn off the computer and hide! I do that and hide in her room but I forget to turn off the lights do I go back to my room but he's  already upstairs. so I try to talk him down and telling him there are other ways of teaching other than hitting so he gets his metal pole, i scream and run into my room. for normal people this would be the end of it but after being emo its hard not fall for the tendencies, i had these sick twisted desires to staple my hand and pierce my skin with binder pins, it took all I had not to. i can't live like this anymore, i', always seconds away calling the police but then we wud be in financial ruin.....

First week of school

So I just finished my first week of school. Only 35 more to go lol. WOW it was really tiring. It's been really hot here in California and with fasting I was getting really dehydrated. So here are the classes I'm taking this year:
Eng honors
AP Gov/Econ
Spanish 3
Intermediate Theatre
Chemistry
PE
Pre-calculus/ Trig

Pre-calaculus has been the hardest class for me. I've stayed up til one in the morning trying to finish the homeowrk. I should be doing homework now too. Someone told me to kiss your social life good-bye when we entered sophomore year. Well, I guess I should be. This year doesn't seem as good as last year. A lot of my friends are drifting away. It seems... hollow....

Just a random question...

does anyone know if your fast breaks if you throw up???

Ramadan and other random shizz

 So I havn't exactly been feeling well, since I came back, a mild stomach flu. Ramadan Mubarak to my Muslim readers. I'll continue travel posts later. I can't fast if you guys know what I mean,.which gives me time to recover. By the way do you have to fast if you've got a severe, fever, cold, cough or something like. Fasting for me has only been fard for a very short time noe, because of my age. I never really had gotten sick during ramadan. Granted a few colds. Nothing I couldn't bear. Just wondering.
So regristration for sophomore year was today. I got to see all my friends, get my books, take the school pictures blah blah. All while wearing a Dolce & Gabana headscarve I picked up at Dubai. They had a lot of designer scarves for less, so I picked up a few ( A LOT).
At the moment I have an obsessioon with childhood movies. Especially disney princess movies. I have no idea why. I miss my old home, from like 3 years back, because it was small and cozy. Not that I don't LOVe this new house. But it seems so big. I don't know I'm just wishing that it would be like winter and it would snow and there would be like a fireplace. My old home had that feeling. You guys are going to laugh at me but my old home was demolished and remodeled into this current one. No change in location or wheather. It just felt more cozier. I suddenly miss my childhood fir some reason too. It feels like everything is material and big and so uggg. I need simple-ness in my life and I have no idea how to achive it. So I got my eid clothes in Bangladesh and a pair of matching heels. I decided to give up wearing heels over 3 inches for awhile. I think it might come off as trashy gocven my age. Last year for eid i wore this pair of 4 1/2 inch heels that were AH-DOR-ABLE I'm not exactly that short compared with other Bengalis, so someone ( grrr0 asked my mom your daughter is so tall how are you going to find her a husband as tall as her. For the record I"m like 5' 3" and 1/2. People here for some reason are really short. Most don't even make it to 5'.

Part 3 : Bangladesh

I forgot to mention in my previous post about the complications at Jeddah airport. GRRRRR. We took like a dozen air freashners and put them in our luggage. America accepted them but Jeddah wouldn't. And they took the scissor ( again accepted by America) we took for cutting our hair for Umrah. So yeah At Dhaka my dad's older brother, his daughter, and my eldest aunt's middle son met us there. They took a bus from Chittagong to Dhaka  the day before so they could take our ten luggages ( not including carry-ons) we had. My uncle and older cousin ( the guy) took our luggage, and the girl was going to Chittagong with us by plane. OH MY GAWDDDDDD. That thing should not even called a plane. it was old and rusty and hadlike twenty seats, a bathroom with no sink, it was ughhhh. and there was so much turbulance we thought we were gonna die!. My cousin who had never been on a plane was pretty freaked out. All th other passengers were bussiness people and used to it, that they took no notice of it. They just sat reading their newspaper while my parents were making kalma lol. My mom's youngest brother met us at the airport and brought a car and minivan to take us to my dad's house, where both sides would meet us. Dear lord, there is soooo much traffis in Bangaldesh. What would of taken like half an hour in America took us an extra hour. It was raining that day took. So we got out of the car, where everyone crowded around to see us. The servants carried our luggage and cousins helped us out of the car with individual umbrellas. We hadn't seen everyone in 4 years, so we got a lot os special attention. In America, my family is the avergae upper middle classish family ( though we are a litle tight with money at the moment). In Bangladesh there are servants galore. What ever we say can get done with in seconds. There's a servant only a few older than me who adresses me in a formal tone. totally not what I was used to. My sister and I were escorted to our room , where people were peering in through the doors to look at us. It was admittedly, slightly creepy. Did I mention the massive amount of hugging that had to be endured? Sorry not a hugger. The electricity goes out on a daily basis in Bangladesh. Especially where my dad's house is. There is like no more than ten hours of electricity a day. And my grandafather had rented all the surrounding land for tennents. the area was hot, crowded, filthy, and slightly stinky. You needed light in the day time too. Thank god there was a generator. So that day I ate properly for the first time in a week. There was a lot of family, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, sister- in- laws ( cousins' wives), brother-in-laws, nieces, and nephews. plus even like my grandparents brothers and siters and there kids, grandkids, and grandkids.
   There's still a lot more of my travels I can't wait to share, but I'm done for now.

Part 2 of my travels

So the next day day two of my travels, I was flying from Dubai to Jeddah in Saudi Arabia. We made Ihram in our hotel, the intentions, and the prayer, because of some complicated thing I really can't explain, but we wouldnt have time to go to a Miqat for our first Umrah. It felt so good even before I even left the hotel, that state of total purity and spirituality. And in the hotel lobby, when we were checking out, we saw all these people in the state of Ihram. I can't describe that feeling of unity. So went on the plane for like and hour and half. Then we reached Jeddah. Again as I got off the plain the heat wave struck. It really is disguting lol. A family friend who was on vacation at Jeddah with his family like I am in Bngladesh offered to keep our extra luggage that was meant for Bangladesh at his mother's house. And a distant relative of ours whose husband lived in Saudi helped out too. We took a mini van from the airport to our hotel in Makkah. It took about an hour. So we arrived around midnight. We hadnt had any rest or food but we decided to do Umrah anyway that night. Oh my gosh when I saw the Kabbah for the first time. I mean you see pictures of it but ..... oh my gosh. So we did Umrah and we stayed at the Masjid until Fajr. So since we hadnt eaten since the day before, had no rest or anything, we got really really dizzy. It was exhausting. The fajr adhan had been done but the actually jammat was like 45 minutes later. And conveniently no spoke Engliah. We managed to make it through prayets and collapsed on our beds and slept til way late in the day. My parents manged to pray all five prayers in the masjid, but my sisters and I weren't always strong enough. So I'd usually pray once in the hotel room. Luckily we stayed at the Makkah Hilton towers, which is literally right next to the masjid, and the prayers, even the jammat can be heard. So I could pray from my room. My younger sister wasnt feeling well when we weren't doing Umrah, we really didnt eat well those days. Just junk and we were really tired. I was fine during the times we made Umrah mashallah. And even my sic year old sister perfomed Umrah. So we stayed three nights and manged to make three Umrahs.
   Then we wet to Madinah. Thankfully much less crowded. We stayed again right next to the masjid. The fist we arrived we checked in and while my two younger sisters got some rest I went with my parents to pray Asr. It was really windy so I designer looking sunglasses and purse ( for keycard with me). I hadnt emptied my purse before so it had my phone and ipod ( even though I took out all the music before going there) in there. I have something to take up with those, as my sister and I called them, burqani gaurds (haha), they were really strict and wouldnt let women in with phones. ipod was okay, but no phones and cameras. I was really ticked and dissapointed because I wanted to take pics of the inside. Its just so beautiful. So my mom went in there first prayed, then came out held my purse, and then I went inside. We were already too late for jammat anyways. There was a young mother with an infant and toddler with a phone, and they wouldn't let her either. The men's security was a lottttt less strict, so my dad did all the camera work. We went on jiharra and so Arafat, battlefield of Uhud, the prophet's grave, etc. We left at the end of the week. driving back to Jeddah and then took a connecting flight back to duvai and went to Dhaka.
  I'm contuning part three in a seperate post ( I'm back home now!) i think this is getting a bit too long.

Hello wonderful people Part 1: dubai day 1

No I'm not back, I'm in Bangladesh, but I found internet, so take that world.
So I took a flight from LAX to Dubai. I hate flying.  Espeacially for 16 hours. I don't sleep at all, so I was looked terrible when I got off. I found an old friend of mine, that I had hadn't seen in forever. I saw her at LA and she said she was going to India ( from Dubai) and she was going by herself. I was pretty shocked that she was going alone ( because of our age) and she really did need some help, so she said she was glad she found me. On the plane I bunch of movies and drank a ton of soda. That is what plane entertainment. So when we landed at Dubai, I stepped off the plane and I was like holy ****. It was so hot and humid, not at all what I'm used to. We took those stairs off the plane and then went to the airpost. It wasn't bad. But not busy like the LA one. And all around me were these dudes in those long white dress/shirt thingies. It looked so typical movie like, I had to laugh. There weren\t that many hijabis like I expected, but I could tell people were Muslim, so I still Muslim coliuntry experience. My connecting flight wasnt til like a day later, so we were spending some time in Dubai. My friend was gonna spend an extra day and was spending it at her relatives' house, who she never actually met. So it took us awhile to help her find her family, lol, since we couldn' just leave her by herself. So we waited for the bus to take us to our hotel.
The hotel was amazing!!! the rooms were really cool. They had a buffet for every meal. And the food was really delicious too. I could finally eat meat outside of my home, since everything was halal, and I could sausages too. I was wearing hijab during my time in the Middle East, since I figured there isn't any temptations for me not to wear it here anyways, plus I was here for Umrah.
We went shopping at one of the malls, somewhat near the hotel. I bought like a billion hijabs, and my very first two abayas; one plain and another embroidered. Everything was cheaper than Amerca ofcourse. I found this MAC foundations that they were selling  for only 10 dirhams!!!!!! Thats like $3 something.
I'm going to continue this post later, 'cause I gotta go now. byeee

i'm depressed

Warning this is a ranting post:

So i didn't make the volleyball team, and when I tried cross country I couldn't do that either, because I realized my jaw is hurting again. So for the last few days I've ben a bit of pain and discomfort. I feel horrible that I let this take over my life. Sports in my high school is everything. And I hate not being a part of something. So I guess I'm going to do theatre again next year. I actually stopped enjoying it. And I hate to force myself to do something that I don' like anymore, but I feel like I have no choice. It's already strating to be a bad beginning for sophomore year, and we are only into one week of summer.

On the other side, in just three days I'm going to find myself on a plane on an epic summer vacation. But I'm kind of nervous to go back to Bangladesh. We have like no family here in the US, and everyone lives over there ( or England). I see them every four years, so I'm not as close with any of them. And I didn't actually get along with most of them the last time. Lets just say they had to put up with my very very big ego. And I had to put up with theirs. Their is a massive cultural barier. Our jokes don't translate over well. And I rarely speak Bengali at home, so I guess it sounds very F.O.B. to them. I don't know I mean the las time I went I was this little bratty 11 year old. The sterotypical drama tween. ( and now tween is replaced with teen :] ) no just kidding. I WILL be more mature, even if it kills me. So you guys think this as a last testimony and will ( this is the part where you laugh)
Wow I just managed to change my mood through the entire course of typing. As most of you guys have noticed, I hate typing, so I type with a lot of gramatical mistakes. My apolozies again on that matter.
Okay this is getting very random, did I mention I can't find my leggings and white tank top, which I by the way " NEED".

Ackkkk

so today was the second official day of volleyball tryouts. I think I suck lol. I don't think I'm going to even make it through the first cuts. I'm okay with some parts but there are parts where I stink. I actually practiced a little more today after tryouts to get the hang of it. I hope I do better tomorrow. Or I can kiss my dreams good-bye. They said they are looking for loud people too, so I have try to be more loud. Which is really hard when You are concentrating on hitting the ball. I'm not that tall either, so I'm at a bit of a disadvantage. only 5'3". haha.
I've been running everyday this week. Twice a day. After volleyball to get home, because my mom would rather feed my younger sister, who really is old enough to eat by herself now. And after Asr ( late afternoon). Today we jogged to one of my sister's friends house and back. My legs are soooooo sore :( anyways just wanted to give you a quick update before I went to bed. Good night!!!!

Last day of school

So sorry for the lack of posts finals are done and Thursday was the last day of school and my freshamn year. Wow. thats pretty much all I can say. Apart form the emo-ness and getting sick that was pretty much the best year of my life. I'm offically a sophomore. people have told me that freshamn year is the ost memorable and sophomore year isn't as intersting. I really hope its not true, I'm looking forward to so much more from my high school years. Well volleyball tryouts are on Monday. I'm kind of glad I have cross country as a back up if volleyball doesn't work out for me.  I'm leaving for vacation on the 21st. so except little to no posts for the summer. I'll return sometime in August. By then Ramadan will begin. Wow its almost been a whole year. Its kind of crazy. Life is going on so fast. I was at a party on Thursday and my mom's friends was telling us how she remembers there being enough time to plat for hours in her childhood. It seems like the world is rushing y these days. Yeah. So I better start packing!

Today was good

Last full day of school. I had everyone sign my big pink purse and it got COVERED from signitures some of the ink kinda smudged onto my hands and new shirt. I luckily managed to wash it off. I felt kinda exicted but a bit sad that my freshman year is coming to an end. This was by far the best school year I have ever had. I hope that the following years can be hald as good. I feel like I've grown up as a person and a Muslim. I understand my religion better even if I don't wear hijab. I'd rather be a better Muslim and not wear hijab then not give a rip about it all together. Suprisingly blogging helped me with this. I've gotten sick and learned life is not fair but we have to deal with it and move on and thank god for every moment we are alive. i've learned not to proud of myslef and be arrogant and that humility is best. Personal experience from this year showed me what can happen when I am too over-confident. I've stopped cutting I've learned that its okay to be upset and that I'm not responsible for other people shit and I don't have to feel bad, just keep your head held high and keep going. I've learned its okay to cry, and to show emotions. I've learned what true friends mean. I've learned how to make friends and not to keep quiet but get involved in conversations. I've learned not to wait for something to happen but to create your own destiny. But most of all I learned to be a better person.

This year was filled with so many memories and laughs and tears. From learning that my old friends weren;t in my classes, tolearning who my true friends are. to joining theatre. To not wearing hijab. To making friends. To dealing with family issues. To all that stuff called education. To my health. To realize my love for sports. to heart break. To confusion. To elatemnet. To strange walks from class to class. To vacations. to weekends. To family. To friends.

  So R.I.P. big pink purse, one door is closing and I'm alomost through the next one.

Four days left

Four days left of school! which means finals and yearbook signings. this year I didn't buy a yearbook because my high school ones are pretty expensive. So I'm going to have people sign my big, hot pink purse that I use everyday for school. I don't wan't to use it anymore so I'll just keep it as a memory of freshman year. So there is thing on facebook my friends have been doing. You put as your status " if you like this status, I'll write something nice about you". So we use this as an oppurtunity to write nice things about each other and write mushy, gushy stuff. I'm not a mushy, gushy person so, lol this was a bit of a challenge for me.
I love what people wrote about me though. Haha mostly stuff about my big pink purse and about my fashion obsession. I was bored today i decided to cut my bangs up a bit. So yea thats it for today. Oh yea one little thing to Naz incase you didn't see my comment.

I'm a bit confused with the Hijabis on ranting tour. which blog is yours?

The following game

So recently someone has played the following game with me. I dont want to mention names. So she asked me and my sister to follow her blog because she was followiung me. Fair enough I like to have people follow me too. So I immediatly responded, but my sister didn't right away. Soon enough she stopped following my sisters blog. So then she responded to the email the girl and followed her. The girl followed her back. So today i checked my blog dashboard and she had stoppped following me, oddly enough the amount of followers has increased rapidly on her blog, more than I have ever seen on any other blogger's blog. My sister calls this the following game. It feels like some people just blog to get followers.

My dear little sisters

So my parents don't let us take sex ed in health, i don't know why, its not like we don't know about it, like seriously my mom never lets us even talk about periods either lol. But my sister whose taking it right now has  to do a makeup project for it and the studipd crazy ass teacher who made me do something similar last year gave it to us without explaining what to do. Now i was gone the whole day so my six year old sister bugged the 13 year old. And the 13 year old got fed up and by the time I came home spanked her. The little one cried for awhile and said to my mom, "can I use your cell phone to call daddy and ask him what time he's coming home?" but she really just told on her. Clever girl -.- and my dad who has tempermantel issues, which drives everyone crazy, said he was going to beat up the 13 year old when he came home. i tried to calm him down but it didnt work and my mom came down and told him the 6 year old was lying. My parents never, like NEVER punish the little one, becuase she's their baby. So my other sister and I more or less raise her. My parents can't even control her. I don't believe in hitting your children unless they are way out of controll like stealing and beating up other people. So I grounded her. God that little girl got so mad. she wouldn't even speak to me. This is like her first ever punishment. I took away computer, ipod, music, and tv privillages. SHe asked if I could just teach her a lesson like they do on tv shows with all those plotting tricks. I was too tired and lazy and asked her if she'd rather have me hit her instead. SHe cried and whined for like a couple hours and eventually came to terms with her punishment. Meanwhile the 13 year old had gotten out of control mad her and a had to calm her down and help her realize that she needs to maintain her time with projects, which I'm sorry if you are reading this sister, but yeah. the little one is like emotionally wrecked. She thinks there is something wrong with her since she behaves bad and told me that our parents don't punish her because she has no friends at school and she cries everyday. I told her to suck it up and that I had no friends at one time and our parents punished us a lot and pretty much wrecked me childhood for me. My parents dont get along with the 13 year old and I. like the other day 13 year old was using my computer because her computer wasn't printing and my dad got mad ant her when he told her the computer wasn't printing because he said she was a know-it-all and bossy and had no respect for her. These are direct quotes.

Before you guys comment , like i know a lot of you will, and say things like we shouldnt spread gossip and tell about others sins, i use this blog to rant about my life, if you don't want to read then go find something else to do and f*** off.

ayyyyy i am never having kids.

Would you wear.....

So lately I've been posting about fashion lately, but anyways I was on this webiste I found that I love its called collegefashion.net. Its more like tip and trends for college students on a budget. Even though I still have a ferw more years the outfits are something a high school student could pull off. There was a post that caught my attention. It said would you wear dresses with pants
Ive seen Musliims wear short dresses with pants undeerneath and hijab fashion blogs commend that too. I always wondered what non-Muslims thought about some of our fashion choices. Most of them said it looked sloppy. An outfit the blog author made an outfit that which had a regular dress with black skinny jeans. This is something I wear myself too. So would you guys wear a short dress with wide-leg pants ( I know most of you guys wear hijab and prefer wide-leg) I personally think with wide leg pants it does look sloppy. A key to a great outfit is balance. If the top is loose the bottom should be fitted or alteast structured. and vice versa. Now tis doesnt apply to Hijab dress standards so what would you do. I dont wear hijab much less an abaya. If I did I'm not much of a black abaya girl. That would have to have designs colors and patterns on them. It much better fits in than if I lived in Saudi. They would like western style maxi dresses. so yea thats what I would do. SO I'd like to to know, would you wear it......

So what's new today?

Hello lovely people, so what's new today?
Well yesterday, I went to see the perfomances of my fellow classmates. They did pretty okay, I woke up this morning ( late as usual) finally being able to open my mouth. im in a massive fashion/beauty mood.

I want to go on another shopping spree. I decided to want to update my style, which require a substantial amount of money ( im pretty sure I spelled that wrong) Today I have a youth group meeting in my mosque. I ralized how random my blog is.

After watching the hills i reralized if you have light skin and blond hair, black hair looks really dramtic on you. stick with lighter brown shades. But people like me more tanned and darker coloring, darker colors don't affect us. It really depends on your season coloring. ( you know when people say you're a winter or summer0 Us darker winters can pull of black eyeliner. But darker autumns like my siter should still stick to darker browns. Black looks too harsh on her. Black on blondes should be reserved to more dramatic occasions. Can someone please tell that to Heidi Montag!

I wanna go dye my hair brown, I'm so random huh? lol Well if you ever need makeup advice, feel free to ask me! I'm dying of boredom!!!! and yet, I still have pages of unfinished homework lying around......

At home

first of all are my posts and updates showing up on your dashboards or did I mange to screw up my blog again. Ahh well. comment if you can't see my posts please. So I'm at home because i'm still recovering. I won't be able to perorm or tryout for volleyball so I'm upset. But I'm gonna see the show anyways, which will probably make me feel bad. *tears*. My tv is not working plus there really isnt anything good on right now so I'm reduced to blogging.

How are you lovely people in this world. Lets talk.... food and clothes and summer....
I love eating ice cream and now its frozen yougurt too. Its like super good and i can eat it every single day if I could. I'm craving macaroni and cheese right now, the one from the box with the dinosaur on it. I never realy liked dinosaurs as a kid. I wanted to be a princess. I like wearing dresses the more pink and frilly and sparkly the better.

Have you guys wartched glee? its AWSOME. i have to admitt there are a couple episodes that made me cry too. I love watching tv sometimes to see what people are wearing. And then I google dress like...blhablah show/character/celebrity and see how I can get what they are wearing. I spent a lot of pointless time on the internet.

Only 14 dyas of school left although I'm still at home. what are your plans for summer??????

Surgery

So i had mine yesterday. they had to surgically take out all my wisdom teeth since apparently thats what has been causing my pain for the last 5 months. It had gone pretyy bad since the last time I blogged about my health. But Inshallah Im cured( hopefully) so since I've done this my face has swoleen up so bad, I probably won't be able to perform in my theatre showcase, or try out for volleybal. Perfect -.-.

So on another note I kind of wanted to do a fashion related post on this blog, even though I have a seprate fashion blog. I was watching What not to wear today and they were telling the lady to wear shirts taht came above her waistline ( like abovehe hips, not belly-revealing) and then I realized are there any rules for hijabis/ modest people when it comes to dressing for your body type. And the answer is yes. I know mowst of you just wear an abaya. And I havent really stuck to wearing hijab since I got sick. ( i know its confusing, i leave out a lot of details from my life when I blog) But for those of you who wear jeans and don't like your butt to be on show ( i know I don't even if I wear hijab) there are a couple hijabi/modest rules

1. wear oversized shirts that are supposed to be oversized. These are usually tunics and those dress-shirt types. I bought one last weekend. you cant just wear an over-sized tshirt. no offense but there are a lot hijabis who wear jeans and look very frumpy. If you are wearing jeans instead of an abaya, you still have to dress for your body type.

2. wide leg jeans are great but not on all body types. if your petite stick to straight legs. And you dont want to go so wide of a leg that when you put your legs together it looks like a skirt. it personally looks ridicoulous.  wear pants that hit wear they are suppose to. you arent going for the baggy look, you are going for a covered look. get a pant that fits at the waist and hits the crotch where your crotch is. If you are a hijabi you shirt is supposed to cover the areas that are fitted. but then the pants wont look like they are falling off you. And stick with darker washes. Only celebrities can pull of faded jeans.

and before you comment thathijab is for allah and we shouldnt care what other think or try to look attractive, i know that! no need to comment on that. these are merely just tips.

I like doing tag posts

I decided to make up a tag and its pretty simple and has been done before but what the hey! So Its just seven random facts about yourself.

1. my favorite color in the wholewide world is purple. I have too much purple and people i barely know can guess its my favorite color. Wich doesnt really describe why I'm typing in this color, I just think it'll look good with my blog.

2. I wasn't born here. I came from Bangladesh when I as two months old

3. I usualy blog the most often when I should be doing homework.

4. there are 17 more days of school left until summer vacation starts. I'm so excited i'll be a sophomore next year.

5. I chose my profile picture as a bloody rose because I think it best represents me. I'm happy and a chill person but I have a bit of darknes, mystery, and have a 'tainted life" from my experiences.

6. I have done so many things I regret, I wish I could take them back.. every person has a secret.

7. I love being the center of attention and having the spotlight on me. I love having that feeling that for the moment peoples only thought is of you. I'm nort like the average Muslim who likes to blend into the background 8 and don't you poeple post hadiths about this!) I like to stand out. god made us all different for a reason.

So now i'm going to tag people
Amira
AlabaserMuslim
Muslimah93 ( just put it in the comments)
Ashi
My sister ( winning over my world)
heart and soul
forever learning
NeverEver
R2theM

 and everyone else who reads my blog!

20 questions tag.

Found this on Amira's blog and decided to do it. Sorry I don't have time to make it all pretty with pictures like she did

1. things you can't leave the house without?
      My cellphone

2. Favorite brand of makeup
      Maybelline

3. Favorite flower
      orchids, sweet peas, daisies

4. Favorite store
    forver21!

5. Favorite perfume
    pleasure by Estee Lauder, I usually wear body sprays though

6. Heels or flats?
    HEELS! obviously sinc i have an obsession with wearing giant 4 to 5 inch ones

7. Do you make good grades?
   Mhm i do pretty well in school.

8. Favorite color?
   PURPLE!!!!

9. Do you drink energy drinks?
   No they give me headaches

10. Do you drink juice
    Yup i'm a health freak, i love any kind of punch

11. Do you like swimming?
      yeah, really good exercise

12. do you eat fries with a fork
      noooo....

13. favorite moisturizer?
     Lubriderm

14. do you want to get married/
     Prolly but not too early

15. do you get mad easily
      oh yeah!

16. Are you in to ghost hunting
     uhm no


17. Any phobias?
     aww gawd a lot, bugs, small dogs with sharp teeth, hot water

18. Do you bite your nails
     No but I play with my hiar or jewelry

19. Have you had a near death experience
     if you have been reading my blog, you know what I've been going through.....

20. Do you drink cofee?
     I dont drink it often but i like it beter than tea.


So i tag everyone who reads my blog!
    

ADVICE NEEDED!

Okay so we have this roemo and Juliet project in english and we have to make a video. I'm cool with that and I love the play. But our teachers says we need to have guys in our group too. And I'm cool witht that too. the trouble is my parents. My house is like a perfect place to shoot. A have a balcony and everything. So should I risk my life and ask my parents if its okay to bring guys home..... or should I not say anything and flim at the park???


Oh and sorry there a couple blogs I have to stop following because they give me pop-up trouble.

Pain is a state of mind

Pain is a state of mind,
Once you get over it, you can do whatever

That is mine, that is my philosophy.

My pain has gotten worse over the last week. At unbearable points. the doctors couldn't find anything. I've missed school. A lady who works at my school said to try the dentist next. And now finally, after 4 months, they found the problem.

as I have a lot of homework left to do. I'm going to end this post here. Creates for a dramatic suspence.

Finally!

just got my glasses. enough said!

bag tag

So i was  tagged awhile ago by Ashi and Amira, like awhillllleeeee ago. But being me i put it off. Sorry girls! :[ So I decided to snap a couple pictures and post on it. This is actually the first time I've been tagged.

So first up is one of my favorite purses from my collection.

Now here is pretty much what I keep in my purses. I put things into them as pick out a purse. I don't usually leave stuff in it.

So here is my lip glosses, sunglasses, ipod, chapstick, and I take pictures with my phone, so I just got a picture of my phone from the internet.

Now Most of you guys are already tagged, but anyonw whose reading this should do it and send me a link when you do!

LALALALA ( I know I've posted something with this title, but let's just say You should read this with a tune in your head)

So what's been up my fellow bloggers? I should really be trying to improve my spelling and grammar. Maybe then my english grade would rise from a B+ to an A-. ( GOD I WAS SO CLOSE!) But if I was improving my grades I wouldnt be sitting in front of the computer posting. I would be doing my Algebra 2 homework. URGGGGG but all thats been happening in school has been as brit bloggers like to say " bloody exams" I like that phrase, so I hope you don't mind me stealing it. I haven't had a severe headache in over a week noe, so I've been feeling much better. My mom tried to return that skirt I got for my birthday, even though the receipt says no refunds or exchanges over 7 days. My sister and I tell my mom this, but she's like " No, no it's okay, they make excpetions.
My sister is like " But Mom, it's writeen in INK"
..... She goes anyways, they didn' except it.

Well that's pretty much it for now. so chow, adios, au revuo ( or however you spell it)

Another post omg!

I'm in the mood for blogging lol. So just wanted to ask you girls what youwear at home or what you wear when you don't have to wear hijab.

For me my parents make me cover up around the house too . I'm never allowed to wear shorts or tank tops at home. I can wear tshirts. But my legs have to be fully covered.  I wish my parents let me wear what ever at home, because I like I've said a billion times it gets HOT! If it was up to me tanks and shorts all day!. I dont like to dress up at home, but I wish I had more freedom.

Whats this two posts in a row?

Im usually very lazu about posting. AlabasterMuslim asked for an update on my health. I cant't really give you one till i get the results in 3 weeks. My birthday was great I kicked my sisters out of my room and watched Harry Potter and the Half blood Prince and Leap Day on the internet. My family doesnt waste money on going to the movies, wea watch them on tv or the internet. I've doing these state tests taht every 2nd to 1th grader has to take in the state of California. Ayyy they are a pain! One week of them done, another to go. Muahaha ive found a way to hijabify a miniskrt. ( everybody applaud) So what you do. but remeber this is because I wear jeans. Not gonna work if you are a skrt hijabi, and well if you wear abaya i guess your kinda covered. So what you do is start off with a tank top and pull on a high wiasted sjirt to just below your "chest". dfont call the haram police yet. Put jeans on under the skirt and thorw on a jacket/cardigam whatever you like. then button the middle so you you have some space showing the shirt. It'll look just like a dress or long tunic. I'll make an outfit on my fashion blog about this so you get a biteer idea.

ITS MY BIRTHDAY!!!

so today I've finally turned 15, even though i've been refering to myself as 15 for awhile now :]

Awsome day at school today, lottsa a presents. My sister made me a cake. One of my friends gave me a mini skirt today though!?
Anyone know how to hijabify one. I mean in a way I could wear it outside not just at home.
Things got kinda awkward at school with this one guy though.
Ahhh I love my friends , they never fail to embarrass me during my birthdays. At 1st period they shouted "hey its her birthday!" so they whole class sang to me. And later another group of friends blast out happy birthday at the top of their lungs in an extremely high pitch voice.
This was a pretty good birthday, and a very crazy year.
All the best to you all!

A night spent at the Hospital

I know a lot of my posts are about me being sick. And I'm sorry if this is getting boring for you guys so I'll do my best to talk about some other stuff. So last night I had to have my sleep apnea test done. Sleep apnea pretty much means you have difficulty breathing during your sleep. So my doctors and my parents want to make sure I dont have it because it could be causing my headaches. So I went to downtown L.A.( its like 30 minutes from my house) because my hospital doesnt have have that lab. So there were about 6 other patients who were waiting to do that test too. There was like a tech for each of us. And so after my tech calls me in I get changed into my P.J.s and stuff. And then she hooks all these wires onto me and attach me to a machine. It literally took an hour to prep me for the thing. And then i go to bed. It was about 10 p.m. I usually to sleep around 11 which was kinda a problem for since I don't fall asleep easily. They have a camera and an intercom in the room so they can hear and see eveything so they can monitor me and speak to me if i need anything. And my dad who had to come with me because minors can't be by themselves, so he had to sleep in a chair. And in the middle of the night I  guess he was having a nightmare because he kept screaming. That was pretty bad for me because No is suppoed to interfere with my sleep and he woke me up. So the techs and nurses had to come check in on him to make sure he was okay, becuase well i coudn't move since I was attached to the machine.

And then I was awake again. My tech came in to reconnect a wire taht had unplugged and last night I had trouble breathing so my throat was extremely dry. I really hope that they can take my tonsils pout, because I don't know if you can actaully feel your tonsils but mine hurt. So after I got my water and went to the bathroom ( they had to unplug me for that) i tried going back to sleep. I actually managed to get a lot of sleep last night. We were signed out 5 A.M.

So thats pretty much experience.
Hijab is going good for me. I have to take it off at P.E. though i can't handle it without getting a headache. :(
But minus the total of that 45 minutes since im taken up hijab I've kept it up.

I wore hijab today

So i had been thinking about it lately and i decided I'd give hijab another try. So i wore it to school today. This is is prertty much what i wore: a purple short sleeve tunic style top, a tank top, a new jacket my mom bought that is a zebra stripe pattern ( and i dont mean just detail, i mean the whole jacket was in zebra print), black jeans, and my knock off ugg boots, a puprle scarf with a back undercap , and a seond white lace undercap. I managed to incorporate my style into jiab. The only problem is that it was sooooooooo hot today! i was dying in all those layers. does anyone have any advice for me on what to wear to high school thats till fashionable and hijabi but not as hot. And i dont wear maxi skrts and abays.

So heres what I thought of it. Im not going to lie, I'm a teenager and most 15 year old american girls arent that pios. I thought that it was unbearably hot but i manged it to wear it through out the day. But ii dont feel like it made me "safer" and " less looked at". I sometimes used to feel that when wearing hijab. But yea guys still talked to me and stuff. But i don't mind. I dont want people to change the way they think of me because I wear hijab. But i do want them to respect me for it because It does take courage to wear and i want my friends to support me. I dont get that as much as I'd like. Which bums me out. Hijab gave me some benifits though today, it kind of protects you against the sun, at first when other bloggers said that I thought it was no offense, crap. But it actually does. But i did feel rediculously hot in what i wore today, bad planning in my part.

What happened during spring break.

So I had a goal to post everyday during Spring break. But days passed and I had got really busy and had tons of fun. So I decided to post now while I should be doing homework :]

Friday night- won the iTouch
Saturday- chill day, a day to de-stress
Sunday- Cousins from London came over, tons of hugging. EARTHQUAKE!
Monday- spending time with the cousins
Tuesday- we all go over to a family friends house have fun there, eat a lot! spend the night over
Wedensday- wake up have fun eat. At night we go to a party at one of my uncle's rich doctor colleauges house.
Thursday- went out to eat
Friday- old people come -.- another party
Saturday- Masjid ( mosque)
Sunday- last moments with my cousins another party and shopping

Parties are what Bengalis do :]

Ok so one thing that bugs me even though its a stupid and pretty mean thing and everyone has their own opninions on things are the way some people view Islam. There are people who shoudn't call themselves Muslims because they don't practice it and then there are people who annoy me with how religious they are. It seems like they are showing off. They seem like the Haram police to me. And Im trying not to bash anyone here....but well what else can I say. I'm not the most perfect Muslim and I'll proudly say so. There are haram things I do and I wish I didnt do it but well my life is a work in progress.

Like for example, hijab. I dont wear hijab. I dress modestly enough but Its not always hijab worthy. I dont wear hijab because one I' m still not healthy enough to cover my ears and front part of the troat part for long periods of time. So I wear it Like Indian/ pakistani duppatta style. This is what is best for me at the moment. The second thing is that I'm not ready emotionally ready yet. I am past the age of puberty and I am not innocent. But still I dont feel emotionally ready yet. I can't really explain it by typing it.

And I talk and I'm friends with guys. I know thats haram. But I do it. I try to avoid it if I can. My intentions are never to physically do any thing with them. And I know a lot of you guys are like well still you do it. I know but I'm working on it. See another thing is that if I wore hijab and I  still talked to guys , what would be the point of it!

So you get what I'm going at. Its ironic though because my parents are really religious, they built a Masjid Alhmadulliah. I've been put in Islamic schools since I was 4. but these things happened.

Going to talk abourt what is bothering me today

So I decided to rant a little bit. And i guess my blog is a perfect place to do this. One day while having one of my headaches, my mom asked me what kid of possible stress I could be having , if my life is so good. FRirst of all, even though she is my mother, she does not know me. I refuse to think she even understands me, so even though she is my mother and I love her, we are a part of her life where we decided to understand that we do not understand each other. Part of this is language barrier. I can speak Benagli adn she can speak English but we don not have a wide enough vocabulary of these languages to fully understand the meaning of what we are saying. Like for example i told my mother,  I always trying to be good and perfect.... She interrupts saing but a you are good daughter and we are proud of you. Well that wasn't what I was trying to get at all. I wanted her to understand the tension and pressure I get of always trying to be so. I just want to break out, make my own choices in life, dom't give a s*** about what everyone else thinks. If my choice turn out tot make my life a living hell , that would be a million times better than living with someone elses descions.

Another thing that bugs me is that i son't actually love love my parents. I mean I do in a sence that I would save thier life over a strangers if they were falling off a cliff. In that sence. But my relationship with my parents is based on fear. A symbol of them in my head are two big scary monsters who will kill me if I don't do what they tell me to do. Don't get me wrong. I get away with doing stuff. and I appreaciate them my parents for taking care of me. They do this more than most parents, treating us like princesses. But don't you think its sick to think of your parents as monsters.
In addtion, I don't always agree with their lifestyle choices. Their manners, etiquetts, and morals don't match mine. For example a big fight I had with my parents a few weeks ago was because When i was getting rice on my plate it was clumped and I refused to break it. They said before i got the vegetables I had to break the rice first, and If I ate this way all the bengali adults would laugh at me. First of all i don't give a s*** about what others think, and I cthink  my parents are.. how do I put this cowards? for caring about what other people think. And I could always break the ruce after I got the vegatables.


In sad truth, I am much happier when Im not home around my family.

Migranes, blackout, and iPod

So on Wednesday around 6 pm i was watching tv and all of a sudden the tv turns off and all the electricity does too. So family is like ohmigosh! Well it turns out some stupid kid flew his stupid kite into a main electricity cable and blacked out the whole area. Boy, I'd hate to be that kid's parents! Well we did homework by candle ight which looked pretty cool so I took a picture

But we had like no hot water! Because in my house all the hot water is controlled by electricity so no "uses up all the hot water".

So during Magrib ( sunset) prayer i was making sujood( prostration) and suddenly I got a huge shar pain in my head. I silenntly moaned about it for the rest of the prayer and went upstairs to ask my sister to compress a cool, wet cloth against my head. The doctor told me these headaches are just extreme migranes. I don't know what's been causing them, but I think it might be stress. I start to scream a bit and my mom asked from dowstarirs what was wtong. And for a reason that would take a whole another lonnnnnngggg post to explain I said that a tripped. Well, the pain got worse so I did have to call her up and whse had to hold me like a baby because i started to scream and cry. I'm gonna take a class to learn how to controll  these migranes.

But anyways the next day at school, the migrane returned. I had my mom bring me a ain killer after third period but the pain gort worse. Everyone wanted to help but they didn't know what to do. Only one friend managed to not get too scared and help me out with some ice. I lost my jacket that day too. I cam home took a nap and felt better.

Alhamdullilah the headache has not returned yet. And now Im on Spring break!!!!!!!!!! lost night night on Friday i went to the masjid for Youth group and i won first place out of the whole class so I got as iPod touch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lol. and I'm also super excited because in 28 hours my cousins from London will be here!

and I have like absolutley no homework over spring break, because I'm taking like all honors pre-AP classes. ( well actually im in a program called IB which is like AP but harder, for those of you who don't know AP means advanced placement)

So today I'm gonna get my glasses too! and now i shuld go eat breakfast even though its like !0:30 am right now

An update

So lets see, my mom thought there might have be pressure on my eyes, so last week we went to see an optomitrist. They have all these glasses at a shelve and I couldn't help but try them on. Oh gosh I look horrible in glasses! The optomistrist said there was nothing wrong with my eye but I have astigmatism so i need glasses anyway. greatttttttttttt. But my partents are too cheap and I don't tink I really need them. I can see perfectly well without them, its only really small letters I can't see. And since the doctor didn't say I HAD to have them, I dob't think I'll really be getting them.

So I'm still Sick

Its been like two mionths and I've seen like a billion different doctors. The excruciating pain returned yesterday at 6th period. And i srtarted crying, because i hate acting like a girl in front of people ( whicjh is weird because I'm so girly) So i walk to &th period crying my eyes out and the the teacher and a room full of guys are just like staring at me. So i excuse myself to the bathroom as everyone else starts walking in. And some track girls help me clean up and give me some water while i walk back to class. So other than the pain, I'm having saline iscahrge from my mouth and nose from that neti pot thingy, which makes it hard to breathe. So i start hyperventaliting. Again super embarrassing. I go back to class but discharge is till coming out so i have to stand outside the door leaned over a trash can with a handful of tissues. Then i go back into class just to get the whole box full. I finsh crying and calm my breathing down. I sit back down in class. And one scond leter I yell ooooow because  i experiance a sharp jab of pain. " Okay you need to go to the nurse" someone says and a friend of mine helps me walk there. At the nurses i call my  mom who has to pick up my two other sisters first. So by the time she comes, school is over anyway. The nurse can't do anything but watch me twist in pain. I come home, eat, ( which is amazing, i can alays count on my apetite) , and sleep. My mom gives me eardrops because I think the pain is in my ear. I wake up to try to do some homework. but scream out in more pain. So my dad takes me to the emergency and they tell me the pain is not in my ear, it just feels like it. they prescribe me 4 pills of decongestant a day and some additional pain killers and a nasal spray because they think it has to do with my sinus.

I don't go to school today and at 3:30 i have an appointment with a neck and throat specialist, because one of my previous MRI's revealed i have a slightly lareger than average tonsil at the back of my throat. This tonsil is supposed to disspapper by my late teens. But to make sure This is affecting me, i see this doctor. So she sparays the inside of my nose to numb it. then sticks this camera in a rod down my nose to the back of my throat. She tells me the sinus has nothing to do with my pain. There is a different, unknown cause. So To make sure the tonsil is not affecting it., they'll monitor my sleep nad if it is I'll have surgery. And If it isn't... I don't know from there

Vacation Plans

So over spring break, which starts in about two weeks I can't wait, we have our cousins who live in london coming to stay. We havent seen them in six months since they moved and i misss them so much. My cousins are 8 and turning 3 and I've seen them since the day they were born so I'm very attached to them. But we also hae an elderly family friend couple who want to stay with us during that time. They live in San  Fransico. My family doesn't like them very much. frankly they are a big bother to tak care of when they come to visit and we were lookin forward to some quality time with our cousins.


And over Summer break, once my and my sister finish summer school My family will be going for Umrah. And then to visit Bangladesh. So as you can see I have a lot going on.

got some work done lately

My theatre performance was a hit! This time I wrote a skit about Hobos vs. Willie Wonka ( I played Willie Wonka ofcourse!) haha, I always write myself the most funniest, dramatic part. I was a little pissed off at my group because well, as much as I love them, they cant act. they admitted it temselves they aren't meant to b actors, they just joined the class for credits. If you haven't read my earlier posts, I'm a big lover of actin and theatre. So i decided to make a new and improved version of my old fashion blog, check it out and let me nknow what you think http://allmymemoirs.blogspot.com/

Had fun today

So we have this thing called strike after a production is donw, where all the actors and crew clean up and put away things like that. Well my friends and I decided to go to the second one today so we could go to Denny's later. ( Denny's is an American diner) Well the guy thats in charge of use didn't hvae anything for us to do so 17 other people and just sat around saying random brain teasers, while some other people were working. One of my friends had to work and later she told me , " gosh you guys were so distracting, yu know it's not fair you got to just sit around while I did inventory." I just laugh in her face. So later we went walked to Denny's and tried to convince the people to give us an order of all you can eat pancakes so we could all eat them. The person got slightly irrated and tried to explain we couldn't share an order, thats's why the all you can eat pancakes were only for $4. So instead we ate cheese fries and an ice cream sunday. Then we went to Rite-Aid ( a drugstore) so one of my friends could buy some more ice - cream. I'm a major beauty junkie and they had just got in a new order of makeup and my friend literally had to drag me away from the makeup counter.
" But it's only $7.99!" i shouted for a the small bottle of shampoo you ever would see.
" Ayyy! Why do you waste your money on all this pointless junk anyways?" she said as she dragged me away.

then when I get home and go on facebook, one person i had invited to go with us and couldn't decide whether to go or not had commneted" can i go with you guys?"
I was like you saw me today you could have asked in person ... we kinda already went. He was like aww ok.
So lesson learned from this is ask people in person not over facebook.

My fashion blog

I have decided to re0delete my fashion blog because something is wrong with it. I want do start another fashion one. So tell me should I make another blog or just post them here?

Super busy

So the doctor says that there are supposed to have sacs next to our brais that keep it  in balance. And they are supposed to be filled with air. Mine are blocked with sinus. So i guess you can call irt a sinus or block. Its nothing serious, it just hurts alot and and is very uncomforatble. ANd i have to take all these pills and do things to get it unblocked.

But anyways in theatre we have out show going on. today is the last two performances. Im so excited but also sad that its going to be last show of the year. but good thing I'm only a freashman i still have three more years left. And we choosing outr classes for next year too.
im taking :
English  honors
Chemistry honors
AP euro
Pre cal/ trig
PE
Spanish 3
Medical course 1

Going to the doctors...

Going to the doctors has become a routine to me now. This is very depressing to say. So yesterday I went to do a couple tests with the doctor checking my reflexises and muscle stufff and all that. Then I had an MRI donr. This was my first MRI and frankly i was a bit scared. I am a bit chlostrophobic and going into a vibrating tube for 15 minutes did not please me at allllllll! but it was better than i had expected they put a cloth over my head and wrapped me in this blanket and gave me this squeezy pump thing to use when i didn't like it anymore and wanted to get out. ( and it helps that my dad is an MRI tech and doesthem for a living) And now the odctor wants to run another test called EGG. It stands for a really big word, but you know the sterotypical tests where you see a sleeping person with wirses taped to there heads to monitor their brainwaves, well that is pretty much it. And for that i have to have my hair washed in the morning but no products no caffine or stimulizers and worst of all only four of sleep. Well I overslept all ready and I really hope this test doesnt fail.........

Anyways not related to all this I've looked back I don't post a lot. I don't know why. When I'm typing it always seems like it would be a lot but for some reason I have the gift of shortening out everything I want to say when I'm blogging. So yeah thats pretty much it. This weekened I went to the Masjid on Friday, tonight there's a party, and Sunday night i have a friend coming over!

I've seemed to ignore blogging

Frankly I've been too lazy to type something about my life, but i decided  I might as well today.
So here is what I have to say.
My head is killing me and the headaches have gotten worse. But I'm super busy with theatre to care. YAY opening night on the 25th. Im so exctited!!!. We are doing You're A Good Man Charlie Brown.

How life is

well life is pretty great and kinda boring though but i won't complain. Exept these crazy allegies are driving me crazy. today i had to call my mom to school to bring me some advil. the stuffy nose pregressed to coughs. As i was coming back from the nurses office going to my spanish calss i started coughing like crazy and this tall dude was like half scared "are yoy okay?" he asked me.
so yea thats pretty much it.
and for all the Muslims out there have you guys heard about the Russian baby with born with birth marks that are verses from the Qu'ran. If that is isnt a sign form Allah i don't know what is. By the wat I'm starting to wear hijab again. I think the day of Judgment is closer than ever now.....
I'll leave you guys with that.

what happened in my second per. algebra 2 class

so this girl sits down ans says hi to two the two guys that sit next to her

guys: dont say anything

girl: uhh you guys are supposed to hi ___ how was your first period

guy1: hi ___ how was your first period ( he says sarcastically)

guy2: hi ___ how was your second period

later...
Mr.___ ok the answer is 306
guy3: hey did you get tht
guy4: YES I GOT THAT!
guy3: ok i was just asking

girl : see guys why can't we talk like that

Cronic lying

i have a problem, its called lying. i want to stop but i can't. like today a friend brought her striaghtner to sschool and i just couldnt resist straightening my bangs. and m hair is curly so when i came home my mom noticed. and she doesn tlike me doing it because she thinks the heat will damage my brain. well i dont sraighten my hair enough for that to happen. and i told i just put my bangs up and they became straighter. ( that has happened on rare occasions to me)
i feel really bad though

self promoting

so i decided to undelete my old fashion blog, but note: it does not contain all modest or hijabi outfits, i made these for fun on polyvore

Finals plus rain

so yea finals this week, i think i did pretty good and on the plus we got shortened days this week and we only had three days this week too.

BUT I HATE THE RAIN! its been raining like crazy that my bathroom ceiling has been leaking.
-______- i absolutely hate anything cold and wet. I love it when its cold but dislike when the sky decides to precipitate. some of my school has been pretty flooded and there are ginormous puddles everywhere aand when you are forced to go through them because about a hundred people decide to use the same hallway you use because the grass part is all wet, your shoes automatically soak up the filthy dirt water. ( in SoCal most school have outdoor hallways). anyways thats pretty much it im missing the Cali sun right now.

so grateful

i just wantedto express how much i love my friends! they are always there for me and can deal with my creepy emoness days and break downs and thanks for all the support from all of you who read my blog!

i am so strange

so today was the dayi was finally going to wear hijab all day, and it worked great it looked cute i had it on all the time until lunch.....
so i was laughing and joking around with my friends and suddenly wheni pull a little on hijab i start geting dizzy and then the next thing i know i cant breathe and im gasping for air i can talk or reathe according to like the fifity people who witnessed it 8i was shaking uncontrably and i started crying. the told me to take off my hijab because they thought i was strangeling myself somehow so i did. here ends my goal lol. so they take me to see the nurse ad cover me up with a blanket check my blood pressure gaive water and candy to make sure nothing had happened because of low blood sugar.
they tell me its a form of a panik attack and it could happen quite often in my lifetime
i think loveley... you guys would not believe how embarrased i felt for doing that in front of everybody
just my luck right?

a little advice needed

so heres my story on hijab. my parents kinda foced me into it when i started seventh grade way before i "needed to" if you know what i mean. i was pretty good aout it and wore it thru middle school. when i started high school i started wearing it i the beginning and i then i stopped about two months ago. now my goal is to start wearing it again. but theres is my problem its more a fashion delima then about my faith. i love changing up my look and looking pretty, i dont mean to sound airheaded or arrogant at all but yes i do get a lot of compliments on my look and stuff. now that i im staring to wear hijab again i want advice which i'll post up on a lot of other sisters' blogs as well:


how do i change up my look in a hijab? i just want to feel pretty sometimes what every girl kind of wants

Havent posted for awhile

so heres whats been going on with me:

school is hectic with finals coming up

i have this condition of dry skin that is making my life miserable, i had it since i was a kid and i had it everywhere and it eventually went away as i got older but now suddenly it came back with vengence! the doctor gave me all these cremes and told me to mosturize every few hours. but she also told me to wash less often. im thinking i will that happen i mean come on im muslim! we have to use water every time we use the restroom. its horruble, my life with the lack of water and im reduced to having to wash my hair in the sink. on top of that i have a yeast infection in well obviously a certain area which is killing me!!!

HAPPY NEW YEARS!

first of all i want to wish everyone a happy new years
second i think i want ro change my blog template again
third here are some of my resolutions

1) to restart wearing hijab again
2) to make less typos
3) get better grades
4) to get more followers on my blog!!!!!!!!
5)to learn to live better with my people around me
6) to make the best of this year