i'm depressed

Warning this is a ranting post:

So i didn't make the volleyball team, and when I tried cross country I couldn't do that either, because I realized my jaw is hurting again. So for the last few days I've ben a bit of pain and discomfort. I feel horrible that I let this take over my life. Sports in my high school is everything. And I hate not being a part of something. So I guess I'm going to do theatre again next year. I actually stopped enjoying it. And I hate to force myself to do something that I don' like anymore, but I feel like I have no choice. It's already strating to be a bad beginning for sophomore year, and we are only into one week of summer.

On the other side, in just three days I'm going to find myself on a plane on an epic summer vacation. But I'm kind of nervous to go back to Bangladesh. We have like no family here in the US, and everyone lives over there ( or England). I see them every four years, so I'm not as close with any of them. And I didn't actually get along with most of them the last time. Lets just say they had to put up with my very very big ego. And I had to put up with theirs. Their is a massive cultural barier. Our jokes don't translate over well. And I rarely speak Bengali at home, so I guess it sounds very F.O.B. to them. I don't know I mean the las time I went I was this little bratty 11 year old. The sterotypical drama tween. ( and now tween is replaced with teen :] ) no just kidding. I WILL be more mature, even if it kills me. So you guys think this as a last testimony and will ( this is the part where you laugh)
Wow I just managed to change my mood through the entire course of typing. As most of you guys have noticed, I hate typing, so I type with a lot of gramatical mistakes. My apolozies again on that matter.
Okay this is getting very random, did I mention I can't find my leggings and white tank top, which I by the way " NEED".